New Medication, But I Feel Blah
It's been a year on this journey of finding the right medication to replace phenobarbital. I won't lie. It has been challenging.
I have dealt with a range of challenges, from looking up medication side effects to experiencing those effects firsthand. I've also faced missed appointments, abrupt doctor departures, feeling unheard, and the need to find a new neurologist.
Navigating medication changes
This has been a journey of self-discovery, but I'm resilient and refuse to give up. I'm on Vimpat now and have an overwhelming feeling of blah. It's a weird feeling. I'm uncertain whether I'm experiencing side effects from this medication or withdrawal symptoms.
I had high hopes when I began this journey. I knew I needed to get off phenobarbital if I wanted to start a family in the future, as the medication can cause birth defects. This will be carefully planned when the time is right.
I'm not sure if I'm going through phenobarbital withdrawals or it's the side effects. Since the titrating down from phenobarbital and adding Vimpat, I have experienced night sweats, unfocused, very forgetful, upset stomach, and changes in my mood. It has been a series of side effects.
Battling side effects
Often, I feel tired, forgetful, have an upset stomach, and unfocused. I know it's a mix of random side effects.
The emotional numbness or blah feeling started when I started taking Vimpat. Truthfully, it just started; I realized I wasn't processing things that normally would affect me.
I haven't felt like myself in over a year. This feeling of "not feeling like myself" has been present for a while.
I am not sure when it started, as I've been changing medications. I know that several things come into play when changing medications, like the side effects and possible breakthrough seizures.
I try to research before I land on a medication and stay on it for a while. Now, with this lingering feeling, I must push myself. I need to have an active routine and create energy.
There are times I just want to lay around, but I have things to accomplish. I joined Pilates and a gym to keep a steady routine.
Coping strategies
I'm learning it's important to give the medicine time to get in your system and work. If it is not working in a few months, I am an advocate of trying another medication. Communicating with my doctor is very important during this journey.
My doctor is in the loop on everything. For example, I had an allergic reaction a few weeks ago, and my dermatologist did not know if it was from my medication or an insect bite. Either way, I kept my neurologist updated on it.
My mindset is to be open to change and whatever works for me. I know someday something will work!
The blah feeling can be temporary. Usually, the side effects go away after a period of time. From my various medication changes, it is truly trial and error.
I now know to trust my body and pay attention to my moods. Also, being an active patient in my healthcare journey is a part of the process.
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