The difference of the 19th to the 20th century

I started getting seizures in 1956 due to measles, although I was not informed of this until 1979. During the early years, there were only 3 to 4 AEDs available. My father had been badly wounded in the war, and having a child with epilepsy was embarrassing, as the condition was then termed a "mental illness." Although my parents did all they could to help me, taking me to Harley Street and even a witch doctor, I was never allowed to join them for family reunions.

One time, the parents of a foreign paying guest came to collect their French daughter once they were informed I had epilepsy. After many hospital visits, which I would term as my "second home," the doctors were able to stabilize the seizures. Like my brothers, I was sent away to school. However, at age 14, the seizures reappeared. I remember the morning after their return and the look I got from those in my class, which was depressing, as so little was known about epilepsy back then, and it was still considered a mental condition.

Despite being excluded from family reunions and my father's habit of becoming angry when I had a seizure, I was able to take a secretarial course, do an exchange visit for six months, and hold down a job in London. This was thanks to a new AED. However, in those days, the medical team was very cautious about any side effects from AEDs, so I was taken off the new medication, which, as my GP mentioned, wouldn't happen nowadays.

Soon after I married at the end of the sixties, I began to experience severe seizures, so I decided to have a lobotomy. In those days, this was only possible in one hospital in the UK. It helped me, but by the time the new AEDs appeared at the turn of the century, I had been on the old AED too long to switch. So I still take an old-fashioned AED that does cause side effects.

I now live alone but occasionally go out. The only negative side is that I still sometimes get a look of fear when I mention I have epilepsy, so I tend to avoid joining groups like walking clubs.